by John Mehl on September 16, 2024
Being on staff at a church, many people become very familiar with the beginning of a sentence: “Why aren’t we doing more of…” (or something along those lines).
I get it. Often, these kinds of questions are stirring and inspiring, drawing attention to important matters. In fact, I’d go even further and say that those entrusted with servant-leadership of the church should always consider these types of questions and remain open to opportunities and gaps we may not see.
BUT – Church staff members are also human (shocker), and that means regular questions, suggestions, and critiques of all the things we’re not doing can become a bit tiresome... okay, exhausting. There’s ALWAYS more that we can be doing. There is ALWAYS a cause or an effort we might put more time, manpower, budget, or attention toward. When someone – anyone – is passionate about an aspect of the Christian life, it’s completely understandable and expected that they will want the church to be doing more!
Enter foster/adopt/kinship/family preservation. I have followed in the mighty footsteps of giants before me (see the Stewart family, the DeAnda family, the Brodzinski family, among many others), and I have absolutely caught the passion-bug of the absolute need for the people of the church to enter some of the hardest, most complex, and most vulnerable situations in the community around us. Like many others before me, I have found myself immersed in this passion, then turning around and looking at the landscape of the Church (Timberline and beyond) and thinking, "Why aren’t we doing more of…"
And there it is yet again – that familiar and loaded question that seems to indict anyone and everyone who is not as involved and passionate about what God has laid on my heart!
Maybe there’s another way of looking at this...
Perhaps the passion and experience the Lord has given me is not necessarily universal. Perhaps other people are engaged in different passions and experiences that are exactly where the Lord would have them, and they shouldn’t be burdened or guilted into whatever it is I am compelled by. Or maybe I just need to be a little more patient with the speed and scope of the ways the Holy Spirit is working in other people’s lives. (Yeah, that seems like there’s a lot of truth to that!)
Over the last several months, as I’ve been engaged in various foster/adopt/kinship/family preservation efforts, I’ve also met with Christians and churches that are not currently engaged. In doing so, I’ve personally found a sort of "middle ground" approach that has fascinated me (to the point of sharing it with you in this blog). I have found myself truly resonating with the Christian or pastor who hears, "Why aren’t we doing more of..." on a regular basis and am reminded of how deflating and overwhelming that can be. AND I’ve seen small, simple, sustainable engagements that can move a person or a church one step further in the journey God is uniquely leading them on.
I’ve gained clarity over these past several months by boiling my conversations with Christians and pastors concerning foster/adopt/kinship/family preservation efforts down to three simple questions:
- What (if anything) are you presently involved in or familiar with concerning foster/adopt/kinship/family preservation efforts?
- How is that going (if applicable)?
- Do you – or anyone around you – have an appetite for more?
Oh man, those three questions have been powerful! They are powerful because they’re unthreatening. I’m fact-finding. I’m not assuming a person or a church is involved or even familiar with the things I am engaged in, and if they’d like it to stay that way, that’s absolutely an option in this conversation. But if they have experienced issues that maybe I or someone I know can help with, or if they (or anyone else they know) have an appetite for more, then the conversation can take off in powerful ways from there! Plus, seasons change. Maybe this three-question approach with a Christian or a church doesn’t result in much over one conversation, but several months later they may find that their answer to one of the questions has changed. (Maybe they now have an appetite for more. Maybe what had been going well has now hit a snag and could use some support.)
And I return to the Christian or church that feels overwhelmed with “Why aren’t we doing more of…” Do I really know whether they’re already engaged in what I am so passionate about? Do I know what sort of passions and engagements they are already involved with that maybe shouldn’t be interrupted? Even if there’s an opportunity to invite and engage this person in the cause I am so passionate about, is there an opportunity for me to begin that engagement in a humble and shared-empowerment way?
Huh – Why aren’t I doing more of… that?
